Sunday, July 22, 2012

Self-Analysis


 Here is a SELF-ANALYSIS I made 2 years ago (last September 20, 2010 to be exact!)  

                I am a girl you can call by the name of Minori. They say my name sounds Japanese derived from a long time close friend of my mom with my almond eyes that get me mistaken to have a Chinese blood but maybe a portion of it will count from my ancestors. I’m a Filipino citizen who is currently staying at a condominium along P. Campa Street. Originally, I am fresh from Region 1 Laoag City, Ilocos Norte which clearly makes me known to be an “Ilocana” with my current height of 5 ft. flat and a weight of 45 kilos. In short, I’m petite and skinny. It was in the year 1990 of October 15 that I existed into this world of reality. I was once a very cute baby then with super chubby cheeks with a weight of 13 pounds which turned me into my complete opposite state now: thin. I play the role of the youngest child in the family.

                I first entered school at the age of five as I accomplished my kindergarten and preparatory class worth of coloring books, writing and reading numbers and letters; ages filled with imaginations and fairytale fantasies. My elementary years were worth of finishing home works and projects; years filled with competitions on academic and extracurricular activities. I was just an ordinary student back then with ordinary goals. I didn’t aim for more. I was already contented with my class standing and my parents never forced me to be included in the top ten honor students. High school passed by and I started organizing myself. I continued with oratorical and singing contests. I wasn’t really into any type of sports. As it turned out, I never expected that I would be included in our top ten students. (No biggie!) Now that I’m in college, I am looking forward to finish the course I have chosen which is nursing; a course I didn’t personally choose but in time, I learned to love it. I am hoping that I will do well this year and make the best out of it. I am to make my parents happy by showing to them my college Diploma and entrust to Him up there to continue guiding me as I wish I will pass the boards next year.

                Relationship can come in different forms. We have close family ties. I’m a family oriented person being the youngest. I am not that totally close with my parents but at least I can open up some problems which would not include problems on love because they still want me to focus on my studies and fortunately I am still following their advice until now which makes me a “No Boyfriend Since Birth” (NBSB) but I’m still contented being single until now because it’s what I choose to be. I believe that there will be a right time for that. With my relationship to my two sisters who are Nurses, I am very open with everything. We really have to make time allotments for bonding especially now that they are both outside the country also with my brother who is currently working as an Engineer at Japan supporting me in school. I really love my family. I am so contented with what I have at this moment. Maybe this is one reason I consider why I am not yet looking for love the other way around. I believe that the real foundation of true love starts at home; that you need to complete yourself first before you let someone enter into your life. I love hanging out with my relatives at our province whenever I come back home. I really make time telling stories. For my friends, I sacrifice my time just to see them and talk things out even just for a coffee night out.

                I possess that cheerful, kind, patient, serious, understanding, trustworthy and loyal personality but on the other side I can get too paranoid, dependent, avoidant, denial, anxious, poor in decision making and can become too pessimistic and disoriented most of the time. Others think of me as snob, shy, mean, loud, cry-baby, unorganized, disoriented, “malabong kausap”, generous, good follower and listener, comforter (whenever someone is sad, I do the job of making them happy or reducing the emotional pain at least)… some of which they confess to me. I just don’t know yet what some other people think about me. At some point they can be right or wrong. First impression may or may not last. It’s a case to case basis.

                My strengths and weaknesses exist to shape me as who I am ever since until now. My strengths include being patient, hardworking, persistent, futuristic, confident in stage presence   while my weaknesses include being inadequate, incompetent, not a risk taker, pessimistic, sensitive, shy which makes up my inferiority complex. Current struggle that I consider in my life right now is the distances in our family because my sister works in Norway, my brother works in Japan and my other sister in Singapore. Both of my parents are at the province taking care of my nephew. I know that we should all be strong right now and pray for each other.

                I really want to be a simple person living a simple life. I want to be happy and be contented in life like what I possess now. Later on in my life I know that things will eventually change. I still don’t know what Nursing has in store for me but I wish that I’ll be enlightened one day to figure it out myself. I believe that when you expect less, God will give you more. Regarding to what I really want to do, I want to be a singer though I consider it as a wishful thinking. The truth is, I am still left with the question on “What I really want to be?” hanging right now like a blank page on a book still waiting to be scribbled with notes. I believe that in time, I will have all the answers when I least expect it to come.

                

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